I spent most of today organizing/programming VH1’s Greatest One Hit Wonders of the 80s and learned not only who sang some of the classic 80s songs, but also learned that video production was not quite what it is today back then (duh). Also I’ve heard both of these songs hundreds of times, but have never seen the videos. So I thought I’d share my two favorites of the day.
Dead or Alive’s massive hit ‘You Spin Me’ can still be heard pretty often today, and in my opinion may be one of the best and most aesthetically pleasing music videos ever to grace our televisions. Let’s watch:
This video is awesome because:
how often do people wear eye patches in music videos?
the dance during the chorus makes no sense and is just fantastic.
the special effects: disco balls going in and out of focus
color guard flags and glitter always great for spectacular visual effects
Next up is a video that you will forever hear at every Wedding/Bat Mitzvah/Communion/Sweet Sixteen/Funeral/School Dance etc. for the rest of time, as we know it. In case you hadn’t guess it’s The Weather Girl’s massive hit “It’s Raining Men”. Let’s watch:
This video is awesome because:
there is no way women this fat could ever have a hit in today’s social climate
the Emmy award winning acting
best use of a green screen of all time (the window)
the men, that it rains, in this video are clearly homosexual and fabulous
This video has a bunch of issues I’d like to address. The first, I didn’t realize Sean Kingston’s career was really so over that he is doing Pull Ups commercials. And why is he wearing an apron? Okay, well maybe it’s not Sean Kingston, but it may as well be.
Also, I thought we had gotten past racism. The Asian family is just ‘coincidentially’ in yellow clothing on an all yellow background, just like the Indian family just happens to be dressed in all red. The last time I saw such carefully chosen color placement, is the on Power Rangers (the yellow ranger was Asian, black ranger was black, the girl ranger was pink etc). Besides the racist undertones, why are there so many adults in this video, but even more strange than that, why is there a family of robots?
The third issue I have with this video is that it should not be called ‘The Potty Dance’ if it just shows you how to grab your junk and shake it up. If I made a video called ‘The Potty Dance’ that was meant to teach potty training, it would probably include at least ONE potty. Just sayin’.
For the past eight weeks, I have been taking an Improv 101 class at the UCB Training Center. Besides being extremely fun, I learned a lot about improv and also met a lot of awesome people. But in the spirit of time flying when I’m having fun, the class is now over. This past Saturday, my class and I, got to perform at the UCB Theater! Our show was at 2:30 PM and I was extremely nervous since the last few times I was on a stage (I used to sing) I got scared and forgot everything I was about to do. My biggest fear for this show was that I was going to pee my pants. Luckily, I did not end up wetting myself, nor did I forget how to speak. I think that the show went pretty well overall, especially for all of our first efforts. A friend video taped it and once she gets me the files I will try to upload them here. Everyone in my class made a huge impact on me. I just want to say thank you guys for being so inspirational and hilarious. Also thanks to everyone that attended the show, I really appreciate it! I’m planning on taking the other class levels at UCB, and will make an announcement for future shows, but I didn’t want to be too nervous this time.
I went to College Humor Live at the UCB Theater (407 W.26th St.). The crowd was very different than what I’m used to. Although I probably should have expected this considering the recent popularity of MTV’s ‘The College Humor Show‘ and the sheer fact that high school students relish in anything that makes them think they appear older. While waiting on the standby line for tickets, two of the writers who appear on the MTV show came out and the cameras came out. I kept thinking it must be tough for these guys to have underage girls squealing for them now that they are MTV stars.
The show was hosted by Streeter and Jeff of College Humor. They opened the show by giving offering a beer bong to someone in the audience. An extremely eager hand shot up in the front row. Right before they gave him the beer bong they asked for ID, which the kid clearly did not have by his nervous reaction, lack of ID, and willingness to just sit down without taking the beer bong. He took the beer bong and had probably the most glorious moment of his life. The hosts showed and commented on a slide show of spring break pictures. Then it was time for the first comedian, Jamie Lee. She was extremely funny, but I think at the beginning of the show the audience was expecting to just sit there and watch an episode of the show, rather than stand up comedy, so it took them a few minutes for them to warm up to her. Then was Matt McCarthy (Verizon & Doritos commercials). He really had the crowd right from the start. I think it’s because they recognized him from TV, either that or the hosts discussed that his pubic hair matched his fire-red hair, immediately before he got on stage. One memorable thing about his set was that he read a series of failed suicide notes, and it was extremely successful. Following McCarthy was SNL writer and author, Simon Rich. He looked like a 12 year old boy when he came out on stage with his book and water bottle, but once he started reading passages from his book, ‘Free Range Chickens‘ he had the crowd in seconds. The show wrapped with some banter between Jake and Amir of College Humor, and some skits where they attempted to do improv, but was clearly not.
The show definitely had some great moments, namely the stand up comedy, but it was only one hour long and I just don’t think it was my type of scene because I guess I am too old to be associated with any type of freshman, which is kind of weird to me.
What do I do when a friend says something ridiculous on AIM? Lets find out.
johnnyhighfive500: i dont believe that the pyramids are real
JiLLpaysdaBillz:?
johnnyhighfive500: like i find it hard to believe that humans back in the day made them
JiLLpaysdaBillz: well if you want your mind to be blow ill tell you what i think
johnnyhighfive500: aliens
JiLLpaysdaBillz: no
johnnyhighfive500: tellme
JiLLpaysdaBillz:ok i think that humans were like ever better than they are not like thousands of years ago
JiLLpaysdaBillz: and like there was a huge crazy civilization
JiLLpaysdaBillz: like a fuck ton more advanced and awesome than ours today
JiLLpaysdaBillz: and basically either global warming happened or they blew themselves up or all got sick and died
JiLLpaysdaBillz:and then thousands of years (maybe millions) went by and like everything just like disappeared but the pyramids and then like somehow some bacteria started evolution
JiLLpaysdaBillz: and it just all started again
JiLLpaysdaBillz: just with some hints from the past
johnnyhighfive500: that would be crazy
johnnyhighfive500: yeah but the pyramids were like 4000 years ago
JiLLpaysdaBillz: thats what you think
JiLLpaysdaBillz: its just so advanced you can’t understand
johnnyhighfive500: aliens
JiLLpaysdaBillz: fuck aliens, aliens are so cliche
johnnyhighfive500: they are so real
JiLLpaysdaBillz: i mean aliens are real
JiLLpaysdaBillz: but like they are not involved in this
JiLLpaysdaBillz: ok wait time out
johnnyhighfive500: time in
johnnyhighfive500:i cant wait till the worlds mysterys are all figured out
This conversation is real and did go on longer, neither party was under the influence of any drugs.
Anyone who has read this blog before is aware that ‘Big Terrific’ is one of my favorite weekly stand-up shows, so when I heard that Soundfix Lounge was closing down to become and Urban Outfitters that sells only toe rings, needless to say, I was sad. But luckily for everyone, ‘Big Terrific’ was not turned into an Urban Outfitters, nor a toe ring. They just switched locations and times. The show is now located at Cameo (93 N. 6th Street, Williamsburg) and is on Wednesday nights (instead of Thursdays). Some things have stayed the same: it is still free, starts at 8 o’clock sharp, and is still hilarious. The place is kind of hard to find because #93 on the street is just a grey door that does not open, but if you look closely at a paper taped to the door you see that you can enter through the resturant nextdoor (The Loving Cup). But don’t expect it to be easy to find once you get into the resturant. The show may be free, but if you’re not smart enough to figure out how to get to the performance space, then you’re shit out of luck. There are no signs for Cameo once you are inside, but the trick is to walk to the back (as if you are going to the bathroom), pass the bathrooms, go behind a curtain, answer a riddle from a leprechan, cross the bridge and viola (!) there you are! Okay you don’t have to answer a riddle or cross a bridge, but it’s complicated. The new space has very high ceilings and two large canvasas with what I would call abstract art (I know little to nothing about art), a stage and several benches and chairs. It definitely has more of a interesting vibe than Soundfix does, although it may have less seating (as if that is even possible).
The show started with the always entertaining Max Silvestri. He told some new jokes, that mostly centered around “black cum” (not as in a black person’s cum, but if semen were the color black), which actually paired well with one of the pieces of art, which looked like an explosion of black cum (or paint, depending on how dirty you are…in my mind, it was cum). Anywho…this week’s show featured Julian McCullough (Comedy Central), Jena Friedman, Joe Mande (Totally J/K & Best Week Ever), hosts Gabe & Jenny and Michelle Collions (editor of bestweekever.tv). A recurring theme last night was dreams. Whether or not they are interesting, terrible ones, dreams where you wake up covered in urine, etc. I’ve seen Julian McCullough and Joe Mande before, but they were both really great tonight. Gabe and Jenny performed pieces about cats that they had worked on separately (gasp!) and then performed a hilarious script they wrote about a married couple, with some issues, named Renee and Gene. The final performer, Michelle Collins, is not only the editor of BestWeekEver.tv, but also just recently won the ECNY Award for Best Female Comedian! Not only that, but she works in my office, on my floor. She really stole the show. She talked about basically everything awesome: Britney Spear’s and her pussy, throwing up, and getting condoms lodged into your vagina.
Overall, a great night. If you’re looking to laugh, I suggest you go to Big Terrific next Wednesday at it’s new location. Do it.
Everyone got into the St. Patricks Dayspirit yesterday, by wearing green, drinking before noon and eating corned beef. The UCB was no exception. Instead of carrying on with their regularly scheduled Harold Night, it was transformed into a more Irish version: O’Harold Night.
There are several differences between Harold Night and O’Harold Night.
O’Harold Night is once a year on St. Patty’s Day
The performers are not put into their usual teams, but instead seperated into groups: Sober, Drunk, Drunker and Drunkest
Besides the ‘Sober’ group, the performers are getting wasted backstage
The first group (Sober) came on stage and performed a Harold. They were creative, thoughtful, clever and funny. Even with the added distraction of the other performers yelling and chanting backstage. The next group (Drunk) put in a good effort, as well. Their Harold was a little sloppier than the first one, but was still respectable. The third group to approach the stage, Drunker, were rowdy and much harder to follow. They spoke over each other and some performers really had no idea what was going on. One guy even came into my section of the audience and tried to convince audience members that he was not the drunkest person there, all while his group was attempting to perform. The final group, Drunkest, certainly lived up to their name. One of the main reasons I came to O’Harold night was because my Improv 101 teacher, Jonathan Gabrus, was to perform in the last team of the night. The ‘Drunkest’ group sloshed onto the stage and all tried to talk at once, mostly telling everyone to shut up. The only person who actually did try to do some improv was Gabrus, but was ignored by the rest of his team. That’s when the bottles started breaking. It was pretty dangerous, especially considering that audience members were sitting on the edge of the stage. They started to pour drinks on each other and then eventually into the audience. It was about this time that the intern started freaking out, trying to sweep up the glass. The guy from the previous group, who tried to say he was not drunk, was on stage for some reason and kept falling down and taking other people down with him. Then the lights went off and the show was over.
I often think it would much easier to perform improv drunk, but this experiment proved that even the most talented improv-ers are no match for alcohol. Even though it turned into a cluster fuck toward the end of the show, it was super entertaining to watch. And it wasn’t a total waste because Team Sober performed a real Harold and Team Drunk’s was not half bad either. I’ve never been happier to have been in standing room only, mainly due to the fact that I left the theater without having any drinks spilled on me, nor with any glass stuck into my skin.
Tonight I went to a show that is pretty much already my new obsession: I Eat Pandas. You might be thinking to yourself, “What is this girl talking about?” or you might already be cool and know about it.
I Eat Pandas is a two woman (Eliza Skinner and Glennis McMurray) musical improv power house, which also includes a piano player. They perform three Broadway-esque musicals in one hour, all three of which are based on a one word suggestion. The first musical is performed in 25 minutes, followed by a 15 minute musical and a five minute musical. Each short musical was completely unique, believable, impressive and inspiring (for me, personally). Also, their timing was fantastic, not only in terms of delivery, but they set the lights on a timer at the beginning of each performance and finished exactly when the lights went off. Tonight’s suggestion was ‘dragon’.
The 25-minute musical dealt with themes of longing for the unknown, love and honesty. Skinner and McMurray played several characters each and almost seamlessly broke out into song, when appropriate. The songs were intelligent and extremely funny. The 15-minute show, showcased two ducks who wished they were a dragon and a R&B singer, respectively. By the end of this performance, they literally had the audience clapping and quacking along. The final installment dealth with dragon sisters who struggled to find common ground.
This may be my new favorite show to go to. I know that I Eat Panda will be performing again next Monday at 9:30 at the UCB Theater (407 w.26th St.) and I will definitely be in attendance. I don’t believe that they perform each and every week, so I would highly recommend going.
Last night I went to a show that I’ve been thinking about going to for awhile. At first I just wanted to go because I liked the name ‘Magic Box of Stories’, and then I wanted to go because I realized that the host’s last name spelled out GET-HARD. But I didn’t go see it at first, because those were kind of superficial and stupid reasons to go pay to do something. After all this thinking with virtually nothing to show for it, Chris Gethard hosted a Harold night that I attended. In between each Harold (group performance, for those of us not familiar with the UCB), Gethard came out and gave the audience a little taste of what his show was like…and I was sold. Being the stalker that I am, I found out that he is from West Orange, NJ. Since I am from neighboring South Orange, at this point there was no way I was not going to this show. I recruited two friends (one from West Orange) to accompany me.
The main premise of the show is that a lot of crazy/awkward/funny/random shit has happened to Chris Gethard in his life and he wants to share these experiences with whoever will listen. He writes part of the experience down on multi-colored notecards and puts them inside a box (…a magic box) and lets the audience pull cards from the box, to determine what he shares that evening. I don’t want to give away any of the stories, but to give you an idea of what you’ll be getting yourself into, we heard about how he lost his virginity, drove down to Princeton to beat the shit out of someone he didn’t know for “IM-bombing” him during his freshman year at Rutgers University, being raped by a girl and his short-lived career as a pro-wrestling manager (in my hometown of South Orange…woo woo represent).
As aforementioned, he asks the audience to pick cards. My friend, Danielle, yells out, “I want to pick it! I’m from West Orange too!”. Which leads to him asking her how she knew this, leading to her pointing at me (also a stranger) and then the two of them realizing that they grew up litterally one block from each other, and Danielle realizing that she knows the person who he has described as, recently, having been arrested for child pornography. It was a great moment intime.
This show occurs semi-often at the UCB and is worth the 500 pennies ($5) it costs for admission. Check it out people.
As some of you may remember, I did some voice overs for a promotion called ‘Ask Ray J’ for VH1.com. I wanted to have the video embeded onto the page, but it is currently not working. So I will keep trying to get it up, but until then you can check out the videoshere and here.
I, along with four other women, sing the theme song. I also ask one question per episode. See if you can guess which one I am! Also I am the sexy voice saying ‘Ask Ray J’ at the begining and end. Please leave feedback in the comments section. There are three more videos that will be out soon enough, which I will post as soon as they are ready! Enjoy!
For the past eight weeks, I have been taking an Improv 101 class at the 
I went to 
failed suicide notes, and it was extremely successful. Following McCarthy was SNL writer and author, Simon Rich. He looked like a 12 year old boy when he came out on stage with his book and water bottle, but once he started reading passages from his book, ‘
